Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Interview with Jackie Chan –By Ryan the Racist Interviewer

RRI - So J-star, you don’t mind if I call you that do you?

Jackie- I don’t know what you are after, but I have connections in high places. You’ll regret doing this.

RRI- J-star it is. So J-star, just to get an idea of who you are; If you were a soup, what kind would you be?

Jackie- ….

RRI- Let me rephrase. If you could kill all the whales in the world, would you?

Jackie- …i…don’t

RRI- Alright, alright that was a loaded question I know. What’s it like in Japan?

Jackie- I’ve heard it’s a beautiful island. Now can you please loosen this rope?

RRI- HAHAHA, that’s rich! Sounding like you’ve never been… And your favourite type of sushi?

Jackie- I’m more of a Dim Sum fan. I have money, is it money you want?

RRI- What I want is for some goddamn straight answers! So how was your country affected when they defeated Russia in 1905.

Jackie- I’M CHINESE YOU FUCKING IDIOT.

RRI rises slowly and starts to remove his belt.

Jackie- oh fuck oh fu…you english all crazy! Like pulp fiction!

Remaining silent, RRI places the belt on the coffee table.

RRI- Then WHY does it SAY you’re Japanese on Wikipedia??

TRUSTING THE INFORMATION FOUND ON WIKIPEDIA CAN CAUSE GREAT MISUNDERSTANDINGS

1 comment:

  1. Funny, but now Jackie has lost all respect for us and will never do a real... I mean another interview for us.

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